On This Thanksgiving Eve

On this Thanksgiving Eve I find myself in more need than I was in even a couple days ago;test results that say I have a longer treatment protocol ahead, loss of a job that turned a small income into zero….

but that said, I find myself full of thanksgiving and gratefulness. 

I have the love and support of God-given friends that are blessing me in words, prayers and deeds. I am being exhorted and reminded where my treasures lie.

I am in a very sweet place with the Lord where things have been stripped away and I am left to see who I am in Him, the inward growth that I have attained, and in surrender and making myself available for whatever tasks He has for me to compete I have such peace.

I also recognize the sovereignty of El Elyon and that nothing happens outside of His plan and purpose. There is such peace in this! I am at the best place I can be by humbling myself and being available for what He has next.

a very Happy Thanksgiving
My Lyme Fund

Thanksgiving In Recovery

Today is tough isn’t it? For many reasons; we can’t eat the food we want to eat, we may be stuck at home to sick to go out, we might be to tired to interact with others…and holidays are hard especially for the chronically ill when we see others enjoying their lives and being “normal” when we feel stuck in a time warp.
This year for me thankfully was better than last year, last year was one of the worst of my life. This year I am functioning better, I’m still tired but much better energy, weight is coming down, body pain is hugely improved, my vision is better…
Today though at the family gathering I was feeling the effects of some inflammation and fatigue, I wasn’t feeling that talkative, although I did my best. I was feeling a bit fuzzy in the head and sleepy. I was able to stick completely to my diet, although I am still getting a terrible inflammatory response it seems no matter what I eat, this is driving me crazy.
What is really hard is seeing everyone else move on with their lives and relationships, and here I am all by myself. Easy to throw a pity party because it hurts so very badly, but I am hopeful that next year will be different because I am getting better!
So I am kind of sad and grateful tonight.
I am hoping all you other CII (chronic invisible illness) sufferers out there had a good day.